Tuesday, February 18, 2014
...About Anger
I’ve been thinking…about anger.
My only brother passed away in July of 2013. He was not only my brother, he was my
business partner, my mentor, my best friend, and in a lot of ways a father
figure. He had been dealing with health
issues for the past three years and could never seem to make any headway. His death actually had very little to do with
his health issues but I believe it was still somewhat related because I think
his body was just worn out. I took his
death pretty hard although I comforted myself with the knowledge that he was a
Christ-follower so I knew where he was at and that I would see him again. I went through periods where I was sad and a
little depressed, periods where I was thankful that he was not suffering any
longer, and periods of confusion just trying to figure out why this had
happened to him. The one emotion that I
never thought I was dealing with was anger.
I never gave anger a thought because to be honest, I would not have
known whom I was angry with. Could I be
angry with him, with the medical personnel who couldn’t save him, with myself,
with God? When I think about being
angry, I usually correlate that with sin because when I am angry, I usually do
or say something that I shouldn’t.
Ephesians 4:26-27 tells us “26 Be
angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, 27 and give no opportunity to the
devil.” Looking back, I am
certain that I was angry and was just not willing to admit it for fear of
sinning in my anger.
Over the Christmas holidays this past December, a good friend of mine was
in town and we had a chance to talk about this subject. He had recently lost his parents and he was
dealing with anger and he knew it. He
shared with me what he had come to realize that put this whole subject in an
entirely new light for me. He talked
about how Jesus had dealt with the death of Lazarus in the New Testament. John 11:33 says that Jesus groaned in the
spirit and was troubled. In the ancient
Greek, this is translated literally to mean “to snort like a horse” which implies
anger and indignation. Who was Jesus
angry at? He wasn’t angry at Lazarus for
dying, or at Mary and the others for weeping and mourning, or even at the Jews
who where there for their unbelief.
Jesus was angry at death! Jesus,
who was God Himself; Jesus, who knew no sin; Jesus, who would later conquer
death, was angry at death. Death has conquered
man since the fall and Jesus expressed his anger at death and the reign of
terror it has over man. Jesus expressed
anger and yet did not sin in his anger. Jesus
knew that he would conquer death. 1
Corinthians 15:25-26 promises us that: “25 For
he must reign until he has put all his enemies under his feet. 26 The last enemy to be destroyed is
death.” Death will ultimately be
destroyed, it is God’s enemy so we can and should be angry at it. What a glorious day that will be. 1 Corinthians 15:53-58 tells us that once
death has been destroyed: “53 For this perishable body must put on
the imperishable, and this mortal body must put on immortality. 54 When the perishable puts on the
imperishable, and the mortal puts on immortality, then shall come to pass the
saying that is written:
“Death is swallowed up in victory.”
My friend shared with me how the realization that Jesus was angry at death
gave him the freedom to accept that he too could be angry at death without
sinning. This realization helped him as
he dealt with his emotions over the loss of his parents. It has helped me too as I have come to
realize that I too have been dealing with anger. I am angry at death for taking my brother
away from me. I am angry at death for
the pain it has caused my sister-in-law.
I am angry at death for the hole it left in my brother’s family and the
loss and sorrow that his sons have had to deal with. I am angry at death, but as a
Christ-follower, that is ok, as long as I do not let it cause me to sin. As a Christ-follower, it is ok to be angry at
the things that Jesus got angry at. As a
Christ-follower, it is possible to be angry and yet not sin, but only as we
submit ourselves to God and let His Spirit guide and direct our thoughts and
our actions.
I now realize that my anger is not at anyone, but is directed at death, and
that is ok, because I am a Christ-follower and I can be angry at death without
sinning. As long as our anger is
directed in the right direction, we can be angry without sinning. It is when we either deny we are angry or
misdirect that anger that we sin. Then,
it is our close friends and family that receive the fruit of that denial or
misdirected anger and we end up sinning against them. We must correctly identify our anger and
follow Jesus’ example to be angry without sinning. I still experience sadness
at times, thankfulness at other times, still some confusion at times, and even
anger at times. Coming to this realization has helped me as I continue to move
on from the passing of my brother.
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